Here's something I wrote last night, after talking to Mommie-Dearest about 'life'.
A word of advice: Never tell your children they're engaged. Unless things have finalized, don't say a word to them. 'Specially not to your lil princesses. Because when their sky-high castles are torn down, so is your heart. Al7mdlla 3la kl 7aal.
I am single. I am in the prime years of my life, and I'm no longer waiting around for this charming Bu 3awas guy to sweep me off my feet like a broom. No. I'm through with that whole 'wife-in-waiting' phase. It's just too painful. Build high hopes, and eventually..I know they'll come crashing down. I'm no longer holding on to this fantasy; I'm taking the advice of several people I know, when I say, 'I'm letting go'.
What caused this change? Well, it's pointless. Why should I be this damsel in distress, waiting for her prince to come a-knockin'? I don't mean to be an airhead, but al7mdlla..I'm still desirable. Why should I tie myself down with an imaginary weight? That's what this whole fantasy is, really. Don't get me wrong..I still love Bu 3awas. And he'll know that when he comes around. But I'm pretty sure he isn't wallowing around in misery over me, so I'm done doing that!
I'm single, and until I sign an official legal document that states otherwise, I'm nothing but that. I'm still Um 3awas, but bear in mind..there really NEVER was a Bu 3awas. ;) Unless of course, you consider Imam At-Tirmidhi's Kniya. x'D
So..if you're out there 'Bu 3awas', good for you, mate. Your existence is totally insignificant to me, love..'til you sign the Legal Bond, & perhaps..put a dazzling rock on this finger. I sure as hell deserve it, for waiting this long.
Wes Salam 3lykm w R7matullahi T3ala w Barakateh
Wes Salam 3lykm w R7matullahi T3ala w Barakateh
2 comments:
Honestly this is one of the best steps you are taking, you said what I exactly wanted to say. It's better to live your life, there are more important things in our life.
You may think I am heartless, but I totally understand your feelings, I've been in Life worst experiences except death, disbelieving and insanity and I thank for protecting me.
But all those experiences taught me if I want my happiness, there is one source, it's my God not Bu3awas, Not Um3awas, not A5o3awas, Not 3am3awas, not parents not family :) second after Allah if there is anyone it must be our own heart and our perceiving to this world.
allah yewafegek
9dgk bro, but what hurt more than the fantasy nonsense, was that glimmer of hope that was falsely displayed via the whole engagement rubbish.
Not that it's completely impossible, but right now, I'm done waiting for Bu 3awas. If he wants me, he knows where to find me ._.
Thanx for commenting, bro..I appreciate the support and advice..^_^
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