The 'Blah' Factor

Salam 3alykm

I'm turning 19 in a couple a days, so basically, I'm fossiliiiized! O_O
Great way to start, innit?

OK, so I'm becoming a socially-isolated nut..slowly but surely. Not that I feel bad about it, lol. Strangely, I'm becoming a loner again...the only difference is that it's by CHOICE this time. Oh well...

So 3eed's right around the corner, yet I'm not in the 'festive' mood. If there was such a mood, then mine would be 'blah'; translates into 'couldn't give a rat's a** about anything' *excuse my language*

I'm neutral these days, but al7amdulillaah no remaining signs of depression left! :D However, the dream I saw today morning screwed my weekend up for me. It shouldn't bother me, considering I've chucked all the excess baggage outta my life...but I remember talking to my bro and he mentioned 'relapse'. I laughed that off, but the thought's scary cuz I know when I relapse, I do more damage then I do in initial stages! Whatever...

So the dream made no sense at all, but I still woke up really pissed. However, since things are all jolly-jolly at home for once *AL7AMDULILLAH!*, I paid little attention to it.

I've gone off poetry these days; must have something with the 'blah' factor. Hell, I can't even write to save my life.

I had a fight with someone close to me, left it off at frayed ends. I'm not apologizing this time though; I've seen the negative effects of saying 'sorry' all the time. Used & abused, then refused. BLAH. I'm seriously not making any effort to work on my friendships, and I don't feel bad about it. I love family life...hate leaving home without 'em! I'm absolutely lovin' the other part of my life; brings out the best in me! <3 :D

3eed= 7enna? We'll see. Might do me good though; give my hands a 'feminine' touch...something they lack BADLY. I need to take care of myself, but yeah...'blah factor'. It's like creams & all that crazy stuff wasn't made for me. I'll use 'em once a month, or twice...depending on how high my 'blah' levels are. *Bloody hell! What the hell am I going on about!? What IS 'blah'?!*

OK, I think I'm done for today. Not much of informative stuff in this post, but yeah...I'm not exactly a live encyclopedia.