Friday, June 22, 2012

Update Overdue?

Salam 3lykm,

It's been ages, eh? I've not been up to much, really..just incredible madness. Everything is just a blur, to be quite honest. I've stayed away from writing, because I've been swept over by tsunami-like waves of emotions over the past few weeks..all my writing would have been depressing. And I do enough complaining and whining in real life, to put it out on my blog, too ._."

I miss tweeting. It was the only place where I could confidently say, "I made it on my own." Otherwise, in real life..I'm where I am because I'm the daughter of so and so, or the sister of so and so, or now..the daughter-in-law/wife of so and so. But on Twitter, it was just me: um3awas. I wasn't living in anyone's shadow, like I do in reality.

I won't deny it; certain tweets did depress me, and I couldn't tolerate the sarcasm and mockery being thrown about. So, I'm oversensitive; sue me. But overall, I loved being able to regurgitate life within 140 characters. I loved the rare, positive snippets that brightened up my timeline..but it's the absolutely unexpected, tearful smiles that I was blessed with..which made Twitter priceless.

Most of all, I miss my 'Lovebugs'. Although most the names have disappeared from my goldfish memory, I remember various discussions I had via tweets or direct messages. I remember a lot of the shout-outs and 'FFs'. I remember the inspirational quotes which still help me make it through life's crazy downs. Ahh, I miss seeing UberSocial's notifications on my screen.:')

It's a ginormous sacrifice..and life's circumstances don't make it any easier, unfortunately. Resisting the temptation of signing up again is getting increasingly difficult, really..sometimes I think I might have to shut down my gmail account, to prevent signing up. But then, I'd lose my blogging privileges. Not to mention, my Youtube account.

Bleh. Pray for me y'all..I need your prayers more than ever now. Life uncertainties can be really draining, unfortunately. I know life was never meant to be a bed of roses; I know it's merely a ginormous test that we'll all either pass or fail..but I'm losing all motivation to go on...totally exhausted. I'm not suicidal or anything, mind you. I've not even lost hope..I'm just..err..what's the word I'm looking for..?

'Stagnant'.

And for all those who can't help but wonder..yes, wedding preparations are in full-swing, but no..the date's not yet decided. And no, I haven't the slightest idea when I'ma pull out of 'bridal' mode, and finally settle into 'live-in wifey'.

Keep smilin'.

8 comments:

Khalifa said...

*cracks fingers* now lets cheer u up shall we :D XD how r u doing ^_^ ? b9ara7a i still dig the way u type o mtab3 mashallah x$ , just wanted to cheer up and ummm hang in there ^^ good things will happen and am sure of it :) and plz take good care of ur self and umm che ya know lol ooo bas can't think of anything else to say, just hope I did cheer u up, even a bit will do ^_^ cya :D

P.S don't stop writing :3

Anonymous said...

i dont miss how u pretend to be emirati all the time and NEVER dare to say u r a pakistani. WHAT A PITY!
U dont even understand any arabic tweets fully.. u just dip in some words u learned thru ur years of life on this land.. "ya3ni" "enzain" "sho" wudnt make u even arab. OWN UR IDENTITY AND BE PROUD.

MIB said...

Khalifa: Tslem walla..your comment literally made me grin!:D You know writing's what brought me through life, so I wouldn't leave it for nothing; it's therapy! I owe ya for the motivation walla, you rock!;D

Anonymous: wow, pissed much? Before you go accusing me of 'hiding' my identity, go check out the rest of my posts. I've openly stated I'm originally Pakistani, & have even written in Urdu on my blog. But wait, who are you to tell me what languages I know and don't?

I have absolutely no problem with my identity, neither do I have any problem with understanding Arabic, al7mdlla. I suggest before you go around shoving lessons on patriotism down people's throat again, you get your facts straight..to avoid making a fool of yourself..that too, in public. But I guess you already knew your highly biased & unrelated comment was unnecessary, thus your choosing to stay anonymous.

Khalifa said...

am glad i still have that thing about me hehe :$ << 5aga time xD, oh and i finally noticed those ppl whom criticize FINALLY XD , just 6af them and dont bother, let them say what they want ^^ and just focus on the positive side *points at chest* xD

btw btw i passed this semester XD it was a hellish one cuz of all the projects, and the good thing is i finally managed how to do a good one like urs :') well not literary like urs but u get the idea x$

aaahhh i have soooooo much to say walla, my heart is like jumping from happiness now *-*

MIB said...

Dooom Inshalla, Rabbi ys3dk dnya w a5irah, dudeness!:D

Yaaayy, alf alf mabroook..3gbal the rest of 'em w your graduaaation!;D

I'm sure you'll be doing a lot better projects than I did; I couldn't do a project if my life depended on it now!xD Forgotten klshay x_x I don't need to remember it all now anyway!xD

Rabbi ywaffgk dnya w a5irah!:D

Khalifa said...

thanks walla <3 , yeah graduation after 2 years :3 ur invited xD

yup their storing a lot for us this next semester -,- bs yalla will do my best :D.

soooo tell me, how's everything going at ur end ? :D b9ara7a mb shay those days when ur not around .. its soo normal xD

MIB said...

LOL, I have no idea where I'll be in 2 yrs time; whether or not I'll still be alive is also an uncertainty.xD

Ups & downs..you know how life is; nothing certain..al7mdlla 3 kl 7aal..some days feel like the best, whilst others feel like the worst..'Balance of life' 3 golat-hm.:|

Khalifa said...

awww, well balance of life my ass B) XD.

and ofc u'll be alive and kicking after 2 years or 100 years u_u yeah I pretty much tasted all that is bitter in this life xD aaaand still the sweet stuff to go thru hehe ^^ so am good and nothing bad could get me down nyahaha xD

well LOOL i just had an idea xD lemme just wipe this smile of my face x')... how about when u feel down or bad mood or anything , why dont you, just try and make, car sound X"""""D walla now that am thinking of it, it helps roflll (doing it) xD << see life's crazy xD