Friday, September 25, 2009

Inconsolable

Salam 3lykm

Here's something I wrote at about 130AM today..these were my raw, unedited thoughts, so they will seem jumbled up and repeated. All in the name of therapy.

How do you comfort your heart and tell it 'Everything will be okay', when things have been shitty for the past few years? Can you keep lying to yourself, and remain hidden under the protective covers you've tried to take shelter underneath? Will fake consolation do the trick, or will your heart figure out one day, that everything was just one big lie? How can you lie to yourself and get away with it? Sometimes, it's hard to comfort the heart, because the mind knows exactly what's going on...and it rebels against falsehood. When it overrides the heart, it usually results in a battle where you're left damaged; torn between your heart and mind.

Sometimes you just want to give up everything you're doing, and wait patiently for death with your arms open wide in embrace, but people around you won't let you do that. At times, the mere action of breathing hurts so much, and you just wish there was a cord to life which you could pull. No one understands; some call you crazy, others get unnecessarily worried, and a few just wouldn't give a damn even if you jumped off a building.

No one can see just how eroded your insides are. You're like a raw wound covered with a pretty bandage; no one can see the ugly brutality hidden underneath. No medicine has affected you for years; pain killers comfort you temporarily, but the wound still remains as raw as ever.

Sometimes, it hurts so much - like someone is trying to extend the wound with a blunt object dipped in acid. You've cried so much that your eyes now remain dry; your heart has bled dry; your soul alive on life support...waiting impatiently for its time.

Wes Salam 3lykm w R7matullahi T3ala w Barakateh

4 comments:

Bu Thyab said...

Yep, that's a masterpiece. tabarak Allah. the best part was about the raw wound and pretty bandage. I don't know y i did not think of coming to ur page from before, very selfish indeed. but now that i know about it, will come back laterz!!

Anonymous said...

thanx walla, bro..could it be because it appeals to the doc in ya? ;P in that case, i WILL look forward to seeing more of your comments around!:D

Bu Thyab said...

i've read some of ur previous posts, and commented on those; check em out!!

Anonymous said...

muchas gracias, amigo!:D

will do..while you go ahead and comment on the rest :P there are a couple of poems you haven't read before...i think!